Two and a half years since my last post and this one comes out only because someone remembered off of Facebook that I had this and a friend, newly diagnosed, is looking for positives during this time of fear and stress.
I haven't posted in two and a half years because I have been living a typical early 30s life. Not without its ups and downs - but nothing that MS has been able to take from me. Every week I still take a shot and every day I still use the bathroom 3 times more than the normal person - and every day I am reminded how worse it could be.
That itself is a plus and minus. Even if it gets worse... it could still be worse than that! When do I draw the line? I hope to never, I hope that I can adapt to whatever comes my way - but hell I hope it doesn't come til I'm in my 70s. Let's be honest, though, even the smallest things can piss us off. With my MS I have to ask for an aisle seat whenever I can - for easy access to a restroom, I often have sore thighs due to my shots wearing on my muscles, I can't spit out the words I was thinking, I can't remember that one thing I was just supposed to do 1 minute ago... so dumping my head down in my hands and sighing is just about all I can do.
Until my legs stop holding me up, until my eyes darken my world, until I'm stumped with thoughts I just can't articulate no matter what sense it all makes in my head - My life is great.
To the newbies: You may have it harder than me - but just remember that life's struggles are given to everyone indiscriminately and we have to play the cards. Look for the positives - the negatives weigh 100 times heavier but they only hold us down when we let them.
xoxo
Thank you for this blog. Your blog actually inspired my to write my own blog starting with the days leading up to the diagnosis.
ReplyDeleteI don't think you realize how much you've helped me out. I was just diagnosed two months ago and this has all been such a struggle for me. But reading how you've stayed positive through all this has definitely helped me find positive in all of this.
Thank you so much.