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Wednesday, November 6, 2013

2.5 years since my last post.

Two and a half years since my last post and this one comes out only because someone remembered off of Facebook that I had this and a friend, newly diagnosed, is looking for positives during this time of fear and stress. 

I haven't posted in two and a half years because I have been living a typical early 30s life. Not without its ups and downs - but nothing that MS has been able to take from me. Every week I still take a shot and every day I still use the bathroom 3 times more than the normal person - and every day I am reminded how worse it could be. 

That itself is a plus and minus. Even if it gets worse... it could still be worse than that! When do I draw the line? I hope to never, I hope that I can adapt to whatever comes my way - but hell I hope it doesn't come til I'm in my 70s. Let's be honest, though, even the smallest things can piss us off. With my MS I have to ask for an aisle seat whenever I can - for easy access to a restroom, I often have sore thighs due to my shots wearing on my muscles, I can't spit out the words I was thinking, I can't remember that one thing I was just supposed to do 1 minute ago... so dumping my head down in my hands and sighing is just about all I can do.

Until my legs stop holding me up, until my eyes darken my world, until I'm stumped with thoughts I just can't articulate no matter what sense it all makes in my head - My life is great.

To the newbies: You may have it harder than me - but just remember that life's struggles are given to everyone indiscriminately and we have to play the cards. Look for the positives - the negatives weigh 100 times heavier but they only hold us down when we let them.

xoxo